Comments (12)

By Galen, April 26, 2010 4:02 AM

Last week, I had a most interesting rejection from agent, Emmanuelle Alspaugh.  Below is her brief note.  At first, I thought it was a form rejection…and for the most part, I believe it is.  However, as you read it, you’ll see it’s been personalized just a bit…

Dear Galen,
Thank you for your query.  While I was intrigued by the concept of your story, ultimately I didn’t fall in love with the characters or the way the first chapter unfolded. Trevor stuck me as unnecessarily misogynist. I’m sorry this isn’t the right fit, but I wish you the best in your agency search.
Sincerely,
Emmanuelle Alspaugh

Now before I get to the part that annoys, let me give Emmanuelle credit….

1. Her note has a pleasant tone and is polite.
2. She answered the query! I don’t care so much that it’s a rejection, at least she answered.  Good show. Sorry, but all you agents that are, “too busy” to send even a pro-forma response…that’s just a bad way to do business.  You get a query, you answer a query.  Hey, it’s what your mom would say about good manners.  How long does it take to: 1. Press reply, 2. Paste in a canned rejection, and 3. Click on Send? Ten seconds? Nathan Bransford gets more queries than God, and like God responds to all prayer, Bransford responds to all queries.  So, to all you non-responding agents…poor from. Badly done.
3. Her answer was personalized, leading me to believe she at least read parts of the query.

Okay, now to the annoyance–and I’m sure you know what it is, “Trevor stuck me as unnecessarily misogynist.”

• Okay, I’m impressed with, “misogynist,” but wonder at it’s selection. To show off? Closet passive-aggressive? Whatever. 
• More to the point, her evaluation is based on one chapter…if she got all the way through it. Yes, Trevor has problems, as do the other major characters in the book. Of course they have problems.  You kidding me?? Correct me if I’m wrong, please, but in order to have a character arc, you need a starting point from which to grow, change, and improve.  Without such an arc, and without flaws, I would have been lambasted as incapable of creating interesting characters!  She would have said my folks were flat, cardboard stereotypes.
• Trevor’s view of women…at the outset…is a starting point, and serves as a springboard for the crispy interaction between he and the female lead.  Eventually, of course, he sees the light.  However, Ms Alspaugh apparently couldn’t wait for that to happen.  She just became annoyed that he had “women issues” and reached for the reject button. Apparently she likes her characters a little more on the bland and milksop side. Or, perhaps, with the kind of flaws of which she approves. Too bad.
• Lastly, “unnecessarily.”  This one really irks. How can she make that judgment in one chapter or less? Unnecessarily?  Come on. Please. Read more than 7 pages, then tell me about degrees of flaw and their place in a character’s nature.  No way “unnecessarily” is fair…or, in this case, correct.

But wait!!!   In the interest of balance, I should also acknowledge that she, “didn’t fall in love with the characters or the way the first chapter unfolded.” 

Fair enough.  Maybe that’s true. Maybe that sentence is more than just pro forma rejection language.  It’s possible my interpretation of her comments is too narrow and that Chapter One of Betrayal is just…well…crap.  Yes, that is absolutely possible. But I don’t think so.  Still, maybe it was for her. Maybe the rejection was less about being misogynist (God, I love that word.  If I use it 10 times in a sentence today, it’s officially mine!) and more about horrible writing.  Can’t discount that.

So, dear writers, here’s your take away…Galen scratches his head…not sure what to tell you.  It’s like that old Far Side cartoon you see to the right…

So, my advice? Give it your best shot, follow your instincts, and above all…query widely. Some responses will be more thoughtful and on-point than others.

Thanks for stopping by.  Hope to see you again come Wednesday.

Comments (9)

By Galen, April 19, 2010 4:02 AM

Hi, all!  I know I’ve done a poor job of blog visiting the past week. I apologize. Regrettably, it’s gotta continue for at least a couple days more.  Why? I’m in pursuit of the wily trout on New Mexico’s San Juan river.  Hooray!

We were away over the weekend at my step-daughter’s wedding in Seattle.  It was very nicely done, and everyone seemed to have a good time.

While there, I got to visit with old friends for a couple of hours before the wedding.  How nice is it to see old friends again.  Very, very pleasant.  If you get the chance to renew old friendships, please consider doing it.  It feels great.

I’ll probably be back with some nonsensical, non-informative, unnecessary post on Friday. Hey, it’s what I do.  Hope to see you here nonetheless.  Galen.

P.S.  Your books are, in fact, in the mail—as of Friday AM.

Comments (9)

By Galen, April 16, 2010 5:09 AM

Two items:

For those to whom I owe books…I’m going to put the books in the mail today!  They arrived yesterday, and, truth be told, look okay.  They’re trade paperback sized, about 250 pages, with a nice, glossy cover and an off-white/creamy paper. Pretty nice, all in all.

A couple of visitors have asked about the ebook version.  Yes, it too, is out and available from FictionWise, a Barnes and Noble affiliate.  It’s available in every format imaginable, from Kindle, to PDF, to whatever.  You name it, it’s probably available in that format.

The second ebook point of interest is its cost…way inexpensive:  $4.16 after rebate, or, $3.53 if you’re a FictionWise club member.  So, if you’ve ever wanted to try ereading, this is a dirt cheap chance to give it a whirl.  This link will get you where you need to go.

If you know of an ebook enthusiast—Blatant Begging Alert—and want to do me a kindness, consider suggesting Hearts to them.  I’d appreciate it. Here’s a promise…If they don’t like the story, they can email me; I’ll send them five bucks. 

That’s it for now.  Thanks for stopping by.  Have a safe and restful weekend.  See you again on Monday.  Best, Galen.